5th month in 24th

Hello, pals? How do you do? Hope you’re doing well… last 2 months for this year. This year goes so fast. A year is going to pass means new resolution need to be written again. So, what I got for this month. Let’s see…

First week of the month I went to his hometown. Once in a month could meet him, yey! The most awaited time for LDR couples, we called it “regular meeting”. What else we did, like other couples else, dinner date, places visited, of course movie date, we watched Big Hero 6, ow the Baymax was so cute and I love him as much as the man beside me hahaha, then never ever miss the ice cream date because he owed me several ice cream dates, one has been paid, still few to go. :p Yeah, he always spoil me yippie :)

The second week and third week was my culinary week. Lots of new food I tasted and they all were so yummy. What is diet? Hahaha. Be prepared some noisy comments again.

The forth week, I went to Bandung for my traveling partner’s wedding. Look at her, my sista Nely, she’s so fabulous in her wedding dress coupled with his lifetime partner. Her face was cheerful at that night. I’m happy for you, sis, this is the end of our traveling journey, next years ahead you have your only lifetime partner :) May both of you live happily ever after.

When I looked at her on that stage raising the glass to make a cheers to the guests, I thought, one day, I would stand like her on the stage coupled with my lifetime partner too and it made me thinking of him, the one who lived thousand miles across the ocean. Oh, how I miss him and must wait for another month to meet him. But, overall, that’s the sensation of LDR, missing.

So, well, I’m preparing my last month of the year, see you ahead.

4th month in 24th

So, my forth month was not so well. I was still sick. Haizzz… better a bit, then sick again. But, I’m feeling better now. Hope I can get well soon :)

 

The first week of this month, I visited Bandung again for my company’s family gathering and the second week for my friend’s wedding. Bandung for two weekends in a row, finally I could visit the same place with different feeling. 

We visited Tangkuban Parahu, then had lunch at Sapu Lidi and had photoshoot there, continued to Dusun Bambu, the new place at Bandung, then ending the night by having dinner at Kampung Daun. We stayed at G.H.Universal Hotel, a hotel which has several chapels on its rooftop. Oh, I was so excited, finally I could have a chance staying there, the room was beautiful and so classic. Classic is always the best. On Sunday, I went to the temple that I visited when I was in university to have a Kathina Celebration.  So many new faces and the environment was so strange for me. Time does change everything.

The second week, when I arrived at Bandung, I went to my favorite salon with my junior friend to have a haircut and a lil bit hairdressing. I always love their haircut no matter who the hairdresser is. This time I wanted to explore the old town Braga because the reception was near there and I chose to stay near there. I had lunch at Sumber Hidangan, a very old café served beef, chicken, pork steak, fried rice, and ice cream. So few menus to choose and you can feel the old and classic ambience there. Simple classic and oldish.

After that, we had a coffee time at Kopitiam Oey whose the famous food observer, their most well-known coffee is milk coffee, the black coffee drops slightly when the compressor then you can pour it to your cup and stir with the milk.

I stayed at Gino Feruci Braga, not so good service, so annoying. It should be check in time on 2.00 pm. When I arrived at the hotel on 12.00 pm, I’ve already confirmed (my payment via online, booking via online on their web was almost half price) and handed my deposit. When I got back on 3.00 pm, I still couldn’t get into my room because it wasn’t ready yet. After I entered my room on 3.30 pm, the air conditioner didn’t work, my room was hot. I called the staff on 5.00 pm, none came to check it, the second call 6.00 pm, still none. Then I made the third call on 6.30 pm, the technician came to check when I was getting to go for the wedding reception so I left my room to him. 

The wedding reception was quite nice. Finally my senior friend getting married after their long relationship :D I’m happy for you, bro! Cheers! After the reception, we had dessert time at Sugarush, the only red building at the street. The next morning, I needed to have a quite long queue for breakfast. This hotel was so crowded, poor service, out of their capacity. Before I went back to Jakarta, I had lunch at Momiji, the Japanese resto accros the hotel, I ever visited this resto long time ago when I was in university and it was the best Japanese resto ever, and surprisingly it’s still :)

The third weekend I enjoyed me time by cooking. It was so “me”. The forth weekend I got my junior friend visit on Saturday, we had a chit chat time after long time no see. On Sunday, I went out with the girls to have a lunch meetup at Union which is well-known for their best red velvet ever, and it’s damn true. 

The last week I got sick again for half week after seeing the doctor, maybe the medicine didn’t suit me. After I stopped it, I felt much better. On Saturday, I went out with the girls, We visited art gallery, the art exhibition was awesome, so many artistic statues, fun and creative. We had a 3 places in a row for culinary. I named it “The Legend Culinary in Town”. Actually we planned to visit Soto Betawi H. Ma’ruf, the legend resto served the traditional soto betawi since 1940 something, but we went to wrong place, Warung Daun. We thought it’s across Taman Ismail Marzuki, apparently it’s inside the park. Warung Daun for the lunch, located across  the park, a well-known Sundanese resto, so many important people in this country visited this resto, and it’s famous for its healthy food, cooked without MSG. The resto was nice and the waiters were so friendly to serve you and it’s a lil bit pricey but worth. Second hunting place, the noodle stall “Mie Ayam Gondangdia” since 1968 is well known for their chicken noodle. During our visit, it was so crowded and some of the waiters weren’t friendly because they were hectic I thought. Actually we got two places skipped because we were quite full, it was Trio, the oldish Chinese food resto and Warung Tinggi Coffee, the oldest coffee shop in town. We visited Ragusa, the Italy ice cream shop, the oldest ice cream shop in town since 1932. The auntie was so fierce, we asked the details of the ice cream, the answer wasn’t friendly. Every person in that ice cream shop weren’t friendly and fierce. When they served the ice cream, even a lil bit drived us out whereas there were still empty table beside ours. Maybe they served the best ice cream in town, we admitted they did, but the worst service I’ve ever got. Well, overall it was nice weekend spent.

Ketika Rasa “Cukup” berlanjut hingga menjadi “Sudah Cukup”

Ya, kembali ke diriku yang lama, selalu memberi kesempatan akan rasa “cukup” itu. Mungkin kali ini aku harus tegas pada diriku sendiri bahwa “cukup” saja tidak berarti apa-apa, aku harus berani menyatakan “sudah cukup”. Sudah terlalu banyak aku kehilangan orang-orang dekatku, entah karena alasan apapun bahkan seringkali alasan yang aku tidak mengerti. Sebagian besar orang akan men-judge itu karena aku tidak bisa mempertahankan dengan baik atau ada yang salah pada diriku. Ya, itu tidak salah. Hal yang wajar mendapatkan judgement seperti itu. Aku tidak menyalahkan mereka. Dulu, saat masih duduk di bangku sekolah sekitar sd hingga smp, mungkin aku orang yang seperti itu, teman sedikit, malas bergaul, sehingga sering dicap sombong oleh teman-temanku. Mungkin banyak orang yang mengenalku namun tak ada niatku mengenal mereka dan aku cenderung orang yang sangat tertutup dengan beberapa sahabat dekat sejak TK. Saat sahabat-sahabatku itu berpaling dariku, sekitar penghujung SD, aku terpukul, aku merasa diriku tidak melakukan kesalahan fatal. 

 

Aku menutup diriku sejak SMP, tanpa sahabat, dan sibuk kursus sana sini untuk melewati hari-hari.Terlebih aku bergabung dengan kelas plus dimana saingan prestasi sangat ketat dan seperti SMP umumny, gank dimana-mana, sehingga otomatis aku sendiri, tanpa gank, dan merasa seperti buangan setiap ada kerja kelompok, berganti dari kelompok yang sini kelompok sana tergantung kekurangan anggota di kelompok mereka. Dan di saat aku SMP itu pula, sahabat-sahabatku meminta maaf sebesar-besarnya atas kesalahan mereka dan mengakui bahwa mereka hanya ikut hasutan teman lain saat itu. Apa daya, hati ini terlanjur terluka, mata ini terlanjur menangis. Setengah perjalanan SMP, aku kembali memiliki dua sahabat beda kelas karena di kelas plus itu aku merasa aku tidak pernah bisa masuk ke pergaulan mereka yang serba kualitas terbaik, cantik, pintar, dan kaya seakan tidak ada tempat bagiku di sana. 

Melanjutkan ke SMA, aku pindah sekolah karena sekolahku tidak memiliki jenjang SMA, sekolah yang masih satu yayasan dengan sekolahku yang dulu. Aku mendaftar secara pribadi, tidak melalui sekolah, sehingga aku terpisah dari kelas plus dan sekelas dengan dua sahabatku itu. Jujur, aku sungguh bersyukur. Mamaku sering menasihatiku untuk lebih ramah dan bergaul dengan banyak orang, suka atau tidak suka,aku harus belajar, karena pergaulan itu penting nantinya. Saat SMA aku mulai membuka diri. Di kelas 2 hingga 3 SMA karena pembagian jurusan, aku pisah dengan dua sahabatku itu sehingga karena jadwal di jurusanku sibuk tentang praktikum, maka kami jarang bertemu hingga ada jarak. Sisa kegiatanku selama SMA, aku bergabung di pengurusan vihara dan juga kursus, sehingga hari-hariku padat dikellilingi banyak teman. Ada 1 teman dekat di vihara dan 1 teman dekat di SMA. Cukup bagiku daripada tidak ada sama sekali. 

Aku melanjutkan kuliah ke Bandung untuk memulai kehidupan baruku, dimana orang-orang tidak mengenalku dan aku berharap mereka dapat menerimaku tanpa melihat masa laluku. Kebetulan aku melanjutkan kuliahku bersama dengan teman dekatku semasa SMA. Ya, tentu saja kami menjadi semakin dekat, saling menemani saat sakit, dan sebagainya hingga satu titik dimana dia memiliki pacar yang merupakan cewe yang jealous. Tanpa kabar apapun, dia menghilang, saat bertemu di kampus maupun di jalan, kami seakan tidak saling kenal. Aku hanya bisa menerima dengan lapang. Rasa kehilangan pasti ada, namun hidup harus berjalan. Aku kembali memiliki beberapa sahabat dekat cewek, namun entah karena apa, kembali merenggang. Selanjutnya aku kembali memiliki sahabat baik yang merupakan teman sekelas SMA ku dulu yang meski secara jarak jauh kami tetap keep in touch. Di saat itu, aku mempercayai mungkin aku lebih sesuai menjalani hubungan jarak jauh. Dengan teman dekatku di vihara, hingga kini, setiap kali aku pulang ke kampung halaman, kami berusaha untuk bertemu. Aku memutuskan maintan persahabatan dengan dua orang ini. Hingga akhirnya, teman ku yang jauh itu sudah menetap satu kota denganku, di saat itu juga persahabatan kami renggang. Ya, jarak bukan segalanya. Terbukti meski dekat, hubungan makin renggang dan aku tahu penyebabnya. Penyebab yang dulu sempat kuingatkan ke dia namun dia sangkal. Tidak tahu mengapa, aku kadang memiliki penerawangan sesuatu akan terjadi sehingga kadang aku berusaha untuk mengantisipasinya. Namun, apa daya persahabatan seerat itu renggang sekejap dan meninggalkan kekecewaan yang cukup mendalam ibarat luka perih.

Selama kerja, aku dekat dengan salah satu teman kuliahku, hingga kini, mninimal sebulan sekali kami bertemu dan bertukar pikiran. Karena kami sesame auditor, sebulan sekali bertemu itu sudah bagus sekali. Hingga kini, meski selera kami berdua berbeda dalam menilai sesuatu barang, namun pikiran kita dalam menilai orang itu sama dan aku merasa hanya dia sebagai sahabat yang bisa menerima pemikiranku. Finally, I found one. Jadi, kalau kamu bertanya sekarang sahabatku berapa? Masih bisa dengan bangga kujawab, ada beberapa, mamaku, pacarku, teman kuliahku ini, dan teman viharaku. Yang berada sekota denganku hanya teman kuliahku ini. Apakah aku sedih dengan beberapa saja? Jawabannya tidak, aku bersyukur.

Ga usah pusingin kata orang lain mulai sekarang, ga usah ngerasa ga enakan, ga usah takut nyinggung, mau km lakuin gimanapun tetap akan jadi omongan orang, lakuin aja yang km mau, at lease you enjoy yourself daripada berusaha tapi tetap jadi omongan orang. Orang baik ke kita, kita juga baik ke dia, orang nyakitin kita, cuek masa bodoh anggap orang itu ga ada.-Mom-

Aku bahkan sering berkata pada diriku bahwa aku ini aneh sehingga tidak bisa diterima orang lain dan semasa kuliah hingga sekarang aku lebih suka pergi ke mana-mana sendiri daripada pusing memohon kepada orang untuk menemani dan ditolak dengan berbagai macam alasan. Aku bahkan pernah mencoba solo traveling ke Wakatobi. Yeah, I become independent woman because of them. Thanks to them who ever hurt me :D You all made me tough.

Kita tidak bisa mengontrol bagaimana sikap orang kepada kita meski kita sudah merasa melakukan yang terbaik kepada orang itu.Yang kita bisa mengontrol adalah hati kita agar tidak terluka terlalu dalam. -Mom-

Aku sering bertanya ke mamaku, aku sudah berusaha semaksimal mungkin, I’ve done my best to my bestfriends, why they just can’t stay beside me? Mamaku tidak menjawab dan belakangan baru menyatakan sungguh dia bingung saat aku bertanya dan dia mungkin merasa bersalah karena dulu pernah menasihati aku lebih terbuka ke orang dan akhirnya mereka menyakitiku sedemikian. Mamaku bukan orang yang percaya ramalan, namun karena tidak menemukan jawaban apa-apa, dia bertanya ke orang yang bisa membaca garis takdirku dan jawabannya ada di sana. Ikatan jodohku memang tipis karena karma masa laluku sehingga di kehidupan ini aku harus bersabar membayarnya semua dan aku harus sabar sambil terus berbuat banyak kebajikan. Aku sih percaya saja since I’ve done my best but still it doesn’t enough to them. So, I would thank you to those bestfriends, friends, who still accept me the way I am, who still keep in touch, no matter how busy you are and how far you are. Thank you guys. For my mom, thank you for being the best consultant and psychologist. For my future partner, thank you for trying your best to understand me and stay with me. From now, I would like to state “it’s more than enough”, maintain whom I had, sorry no more additional bestfriends ahead. The last one already made it the worst and broke my heart into pieces. It’s more than enough.

Lakukan hal yang menurutmu baik dengan enjoy, tulus, dan sepenuh hati karena baik buruknya perbuatanmu tergantung pandangan orang yang menilai. Do your best, care your own matters, and enjoy.-LS-

Just do what I wanna do, let others talk what they wanna talk.-LS-